Day 249: Sports Jokes

Earlier this week the Orioles and the White Sox played their game in front of a completely empty stadium. It was the first major sporting event to be played before an empty stadium…unless you count every professional soccer game in America.

Yesterday was the start of the NFL Draft. This year it was simulcast on ESPN and Court full movie Aardvark onlineThe Nice Guys 2016 live streaming film onlineGuardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 film download

Day 190: Sports Jokes

An NFL player was arrested in Florida on gun charges. The news was shocking to anyone who knows nothing about the NFL or Florida.

Late Night with Seth Meyers
During his domestic abuse trial, NASCAR driver Kurt Busch said that he believes his ex-girlfriend is a CIA-trained assassin. I guess those are just the thoughts you have when you drive around in circles for four hours.

Day 172: NFL Jokes

The NFL announced the possible sites for next year’s draft has been narrowed down to two locations. It’s down to either Riker’s Island or San Quentin.

A new report claims that by the year 2020, the marijuana industry could be bigger than the NFL. Either way, it’s a good time to be in the couch business.

Day 125: Sports Jokes

On his radio program Rush Limbaugh said sometimes when women say “No,” they mean, “Yes.” As a result, Limbaugh has just been made the new Commissioner of the NFL.

The federal prison population has dropped by almost 5,000 people. It’s expected to go back up once the NFL season ends.

Philadelphia Phillies pitcher Jonathan Papelbon is serving a seven-game suspension for grabbing his crotch. It’s all part of the National League’s Two-Balls-You’re-Out Policy.

Day 60: Conan Futbol and Football Jokes

The US vs Ghana World Cup game drew a record 15.9 million American viewers. This breaks the old record of Americans watching soccer by 15.8 million.

A new report out of Chicago reveals that the crime rate plummets during an NFL game. Mainly because the most dangerous criminals are out on the field.

Prosecutors in the murder trial of former football star Aaron Hernandez are now saying his tattoos may be evidence of guilt. Particularly the one on his forearm that says, “I killed that dude.”


Day 49: The Love of Sports

Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
Tim Tebow said that he’s staying in shape in case he gets another opportunity to play for the NFL. Then his boss said, “That’s great, but these Waffle Tacos ain’t going to make themselves.”

According to a new poll, Donald Sterling has just passed Justin Bieber as the most hated man in America. When he heard this, Justin Bieber was thrilled because he’s finally being considered a man.

Using advanced facial recognition software, the NSA is collecting millions of images of people’s faces a day. And that’s just to keep up with Bruce Jenner.