Tag: Apple

Watch Movie Online Kong: Skull Island (2017) subtitle english

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Kong: Skull Island (2017) HD

Director : Jordan Vogt-Roberts.
Producer : Thomas Tull, Jon Jashni, Mary Parent, Alex Garcia.
Release : March 8, 2017
Country : United States of America.
Production Company : Warner Bros., Legendary Entertainment.
Language : English.
Runtime : 118 min.
Genre : Science Fiction, Action, Adventure, Fantasy.

Movie ‘Kong: Skull Island’ was released in March 8, 2017 in genre Science Fiction. Jordan Vogt-Roberts was directed this movie and starring by Tom Hiddleston. This movie tell story about Explore the mysterious and dangerous home of the king of the apes as a team of explorers ventures deep inside the treacherous, primordial island.

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Day 273: Sex Jokes

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Conan
Apple has a new smartphone app that lets people track their sexual activity. And if the person hasn’t had sex in awhile, it automatically sets itself to vibrate.

Scientists have established that an iconic California redwood is only 777 years old. Kind of funny coincidence, as Iconic California Redwood used to be my porn name.

Day 214: Tech Jokes

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Conan
Apple’s next iPhone update will include 300 new racially-diverse emojis. They’re adding one African-American emoji and 299 White emojis who brag about having a black friend.

Late Night with Seth Meyers
Photoshop turned 25 recently. Well, actually, it’s turning 38, but it looks 25.

 

Day 178: Economy Jokes

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Conan
Apple Stores recently held free computer programming classes for children. Or as Apple called that in China, a job fair.

President Obama has recently pledged $3 billion to aid poor nations. All $3 billion is going to the United States.

Day 150: Apple, the Internet, and Halloween Jokes

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The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
Last week Apple CEO Tim Cook officially came out as gay. And then this afternoon the CEO of Samsung came out as being even gayer.

Conan
Last week was the Internet’s 45th birthday. That’s right, 45 years ago last week someone downloaded porn onto a Commodore 64.

There’s a new tradition. This Halloween, if you see a blue pumpkin that means the house is handing out allergy-free treats. It could also mean the house is using last year’s pumpkin.

 

Day 142: iPhone Jokes

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Conan
Apple is paying for their female employees to freeze their eggs. They’re being stored in a factory in China where the eggs are already working on the iPhone 7.

According to a new poll, 1 out of 5 single guys say they’d rather have a new iPhone than a girlfriend. The other 4 said they’d take either one as long as they got to swap it out for a thinner version every six months.

 

Day 130: Apple Jokes

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Conan
A new test for the iPhone 6 Plus shows that it bends when it’s under 90 pounds of pressure. And when it’s under 300 pounds of pressure, Siri says, “Try a salad, Fat-Ass.”

Microsoft has announced it’s going to open its first flagship store in Manhattan. It’s expected to be like the Apple Store but without all those pesky lines in front.

 

Day 117: More Apple Jokes

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Conan
Tech experts are saying that the new Apple iPhones are too big for most women to hold. Which is why Apple calls that model, “The Conan.”

New details coming out about the Apple Watch. Apple is now saying the new Apple Watch needs to be charged every single day. Also charged every single day…someone in the NFL.

A leaked document suggests that Microsoft is considering renaming its smartphone. So far their first choice is the Microsoft iPhone.

 

Day 116: Apple Watch and Apple Pay Jokes

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Late Night with Seth Meyers
The new iPhone will feature Apply Pay which is a virtual wallet that is easy, secure, and private. You know, just like those nude photos.

Conan
Apple introduced the Apple Watch, a smartwatch that can text, monitor your health, and acts as a secure payment system. When asked if the Apple Watch tells the time, Apple CEO said, “Oh, shit.”

 

Day 115: Apple iPhone 6 Jokes

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Late Night with Seth Meyers
This was a big week for Apple. Apple released the new iPhone 6 and iPhone 6 Plus. They’ll be in stores in about two weeks and in landfills in a year.

The new iPhone will also support over 20 different cell signals from Verizon’s LTE network to AT&T’s 4G network to Sprint’s no signal network.

Conan
The new iPhone will have two different sized models, the iPhone 6 and the much larger iPhone 6 Plus. The iPhone 6 has a better camera, a barometer, and a shatterproof screen. And the larger iPhone 6 Plus has a nice personality.